Distracted
by J.D Fields
Summary: Castle gets distracted with thoughts of how much he loves Kate, leading to her first I love you. Very sappy. OS


"You've been a very bad boy Mr. Castle" Kate purred. "Santa didn't think you deserved a gift and you didn't get me anything so I think you deserve to be punished". She was crawling slowly to the head of the bed where he was sitting naked, looking excitedly giddy for someone about to be punished.

He remained silent and was content just with watching her crawl, she looked exotic, like a feline hunting down their prey. Long lines of soft looking muscles moved along her body, breast hanging on her naked chest, wild hair moving along with her and the, now, ever present glint of amusement and mischief in her eyes.

He loved that he was able to get that out of her, make her comfortable enough for her to be able to open up to him, in more ways than one, make her trust him and allow him to peel back her layers, as she once put it. He knew his love was always present in his eyes, as well as he knew that she wasn't ready for him to tell her again, not until she'd be able to say it too, and he had no doubt that she loved him, it was in every look she gave him now.

He wondered if that's what everyone saw before they got together, the way they looked at each other. He wondered how he never saw that look in her eyes before, maybe she hid it well or maybe he didn't want to see it, didn't want to hope she felt the same way or that she could one day.

If only he had before, he might have had a little less pressure on his chest, a little more hope. He would have charmed her all the time, taken care of her. He would have reassured her of his love for her in subtle ways, very subtle ways so she wouldn't run away. He could have done so many things before, but he had her now, and he could do all of those things without fear of her running.

Well, mostly. He still had to be careful sometimes when he-

"It's not a good sign that you're not paying attention to me when I'm naked, Castle. Specially when you've been begging for this to happen for days now". She had a puzzled look on her face, trying to figure out what he was thinking. She caught him so off guard that he didn't filter his response, "I was just thinking about how much I love you". He threw himself at her and rolled so he was hovering over her on the bed, amongst their laughs he heard her reply and it surprised him, "I love you too Castle, but don't start getting soft on me when we are naked in bed".

His heartbeat sped off and his breath quickened, but when he looked at her all he found was that love mixed with vulnerability and he immediately knew he couldn't make a big deal out of it, it wasn't what she needed. "Of course not!" His face full of mock indignation, "this can't happen again, me getting soft on you when we're both naked in bed", he repeated. Her smile was big and beautiful and filled with relief, the only reflecting emotion now was her love, and maybe a little bit of her lust, "Then how 'bout you star getting hard on me, Castle?" she asked teasingly.

He grinned at her and went down for a kiss, thinking that he could do that now. He could touch her face, her lips, kiss her eyelids, kiss her nose, her hair, her earlobes, kiss her neck, her back... He could hug her, squeeze her in his arms after a tough case, tuck her in next to him, hug her on her sleep. He could take her clothes off, have her making sounds for him in just a few minutes, he could have her all for himself.

But what he gets now that he didn't before, the one thing he appreciates the most are those secret smiles, the ones she gives him when no one else is looking. The barely there smile that says very loudly 'You're adorable and I love you', the one with the crinkled eyes suggesting a very fun night to come, the one with a tilt of her eyebrows and narrow eyes that just screams 'I know what you're thinking!' The thousand secret smiles she has for him and the only one he has for her, the one he always gives her... His most honest, most silent 'I love you'.


End file.
